The Sorrow of Laughter

I wrote this thinking of a friend going through great difficulty.  There is family, and counseling happening.  There are moments of joy, and great sadness.  I feel a grief in this person so insurmountable that self realization seems to be impossible.  Nothing is impossible with God.  I can never believe in impossibilities as my wife and I stand by this person's side.

I can see you,

But I cannot feel,

I can hear you,

Speak of what is real,

Life and love abound,

Pain and grief confounds,

I do not know where I’m going,

While the bell is tolling.

People smile around me,

I can see them laughing,

I can hear them speaking,

But I do not understand,

I smile as they laugh,

Their joy may be real,

Trapped behind this glass,

Their joy I cannot feel.

I cannot face what is,

It is growing inside me,

I cannot feel your love,

You have it right beside me,

I taste tears in your words,

And then I laugh again,

I just do not see why,

You can be my friend.

Sometimes I feel crazy,

Not knowing who I am,

You say God is holding me,

Safe within His hand,

Yet the symbol of you here,

Is the sign that He is near,

I pray for strength daily,

As I try to understand.